girl in october

4. 

the scale is broken

sometimes i'm okay, sometimes i'm not

right now i'm not

right now it's a lot

what a weakling

can't even handle a small thing

can't even handle existing

6. 

peace disruptor

chaotic calm

my tears in my laughter

i'm irritable right now

the sound at the end of a cordless device

disturbs the serene of my life

if any

 

13.

they come in bouts

unprovoked, unannounced

it's a mess, i'm a lost cause

whether we meet and whether we don't

whether i'm spiralling around or spiralling down

a one sided grief he doesn't know about 

14.

another sleepless night

running thoughts of mine

another curiosity kills the cat

the cat shows it's bedtime

my eyes refuse to close

my mind refuses to shut

done all my do's and don'ts

it's just not working out 

15.

dull ache over the left side of my chest

over the one on top of mind of mine

i care much more, pretend it's less

again and again, time over time

will this ache ever go away

my sentimental soul, adamant to stay 

17.

friendship grief

no one ever said how bad it hurts

one moment you're friendly

next moment you're not

the quiet becomes loud

the loud becomes a lot