Saturday, October 29, 2016

namanya Sagwa II

I was rereading my older posts and came across an entry of how miss nasyrah meets her first cat. Mew

And suddenly i feel like continuing that story. So we stopped at me finding sagwa back after praying and she was nowhere to be found. How did i find her back? Jengjenggg. In all honesty, i dont quite remember.  Hahaa. i think my friend saw her outside and kept her in a box up in our house. Though i remember thinking like wow this must be fate.

So you see, it's human nature to forget memories
But its also human nature to remember feelings
You can forget memories but you don't forget how you feel
and if you do remember, sometimes how you were feeling or what you were thinking about at that certain moment is more profound than the memory itself
Geddit?

Like i might forget how exactly my world and Sagwa's world collided
But i remember that she felt heavy sleeping over my blanket and i can't move because i'm that kind of owner who does anything for my cat and will make sure she's not disturbed sleeping and i felt safe and protective under my blankie
And i remember that i felt dependent on a kitty that if i was feeling down the first thing i want to find and play with is her hoping that she would make me feel better and forget about the world a while

I remember thinking what a weird cat i got cos her favourite food was bread (always ruining ppls packet of xleb) and ikra (always came running whenever i opened the jar)
I remember waking up with a cat licking my hair

I remember how sad i was to let her go and i let her go outside the house and she got scared of other kitties and climbed straight up a tree and was never seen again

I remember i loved her
And i miss that.

Mew

#pleasegotobednow
#tomorrowisaworkingday
#zzzz

Friday, January 29, 2016

di dalam guaku

Ada orang sangat passionate dan menjiwai, bila baca cerita sedih menangis, tengok movie tragis meleleh, seolah-olah dia sendiri berada di situ, seolah-olah dia sendiri menjadi watak di pentas itu.
Aku boleh dikatakan tidak seperti itu *okaylaa kadang2 kememehh jugakk* tapi aku kagum dengan orang-orang macam ni, yang punyai kotak perasaan yang besar dan penuh emosi : )))

Allahuakbar, Allah Maha Besar, tanya kepada diriku sendiri, mampukah aku rasakan getaran menyebut nama Tuhanku? Sedangkan syaitan berlari ketakutan mendengar nama Rabb seluruh alam, kenapa manusia seperti boneka yang hanya petah bercakap tetapi tidak menjiwai?

Well, technically dolls can't talk but you get what i mean

Manusia, amalnya sedikit tapi rasakan dirinya sudah cukup baik, sudah penuhi semua perintah Tuhannya
Rasulullah, amalnya lebih besar dari apa-apa sahaja yang kita mampu lakukan tapi taubat malamnya, tangisan memohon ampun kepada Tuhannya seolah-olah dialah si pembuat dosa yang paling hina.

Fikirku lagi, tangisan-tangisanku semuanya berkaitan dengan dunia *time dapat ujian/musibah terus cari Tuhan wuwu T.T*, pernahkah diri ini menangis kerana memikirkan diriku disayangi Allah tak? Amalanku diterima Allah tak? Aku hamba yang taat tak?

Takut kepada Tuhan, bukan kerana Dia menakutkan.
Takut kepada Tuhan, kerana takut bekalan amalan di dunia tidak cukup untuk mendapat rahmatnya, untuk memasuki syurga di sana. Pernahkah aku?
Kerana bila engkau takut yang engkau tidak cukup amalan, di situ pasti lahirnya amalan-amalanmu.

Kadang-kadang manusia perlu muhasabah diri sendiri di dalam guanya.
Kurangkan tawamu dan banyakkan menangis.
Wuwuwu

Monday, January 11, 2016

Hush, love

Soothe me into the calm
Hush
With a kiss goodbye of what went by
Away, bitter sentiments of the dark
Take me into the light, o that sweet realm
Within, might i find that forgotten calm

Wednesday, January 6, 2016

much ado about everything

i want to move but my limbs are tied
Someone get me out of this tide
Before i drown and shut it all down
My silence is my sound

Will someone listen on what is written
Before my sentience die
Along with reason
Before the innocent's cry
From unjust treason
For i have written what's not to be denied


Wednesday, October 21, 2015

dear friend, this is for you

The sun is setting and you've gone far
Can't time just stop and hold us still
And wait for my pain to become numb
And drown me into nothing

Dawn broke over the horizon
There's a life i need to be living in
As you turn into ashes,my heart aches
i've lost my most favourite thing

Live on daddy, be my wings

In loving memories-

Sunday, October 18, 2015

the numb

and for once i feel sorry
i'm sorry we can't be friends

Sunday, July 12, 2015

w1sh

Calm down my racing heart
You've known too soon that you will part
Flames ignite but will soon cease
The smoke blurred your vision of ease
Twas  a wish
Merely a wish, understand that heart
Don't fall apart, at what were to part
Don't fall apart